Friday, 7 August 2009


Now I've attended more than my fair share of a Peace Monitor with the Wits-Vaal a Hostage Negotiator...and of course as a flight nurse and as a paramedic.

They were always interesting.

You cant believe what an Okapi penknife can do...hummh...perhaps I should get my blog sponsored by Okapi?

I was always a little nervous in those should be no surprise for you to learn that Jo'burg Fire department,-where I was employed as a Nurse-Paramedic-,had its own armoury of 9mm pistols and shotguns. sort of think that when you leave Jo'burg that you leave all the faction fighting and tribalism behind...but of course,you don' just takes a different form.

Last night a patient came in with massive facial injuries including a fracture to the bones around his left eye with some loss of vision;some broken ribs;assorted cuts and grazes;and was mildly concussed.

He was wearing a (bloodstained and torn) Celtic football club shirt.This is apparently a Scottish , Roman Catholic -supporting club...their arch-enemies are apparently Rangers...a Scottish,Protestant supporting club.

Now these two groups hate each other with a senseless energy ,an unconscionable ferocity and unjustifiable viciousness that leaves most anybody with a brain...or any rugby player or supporter...frankly,speechless.

(Who knew people took football so seriously...its such a girls' offense girls...because you know that I am all in favour of 22 fit young women in shorts running around,getting sweaty!)

This man was a tourist and was keen to watch a football match on TV between two European teams... now one team is supported by Celtic fans,and the other is supported by Rangers fans.

In his confusion,and having already consumed half a bottle of no-name Vodka,and with a tremendous thirst,he wandered into a Sports Bar full of Sky News Large screens to watch the game.

Big was full of Rangers fans...

...who without warning immediately,-and with malice aforethought-,promptly beat the man to the ground.

Fortunately the bouncers intervened and threw him out onto the pavement...

...where fortunately a caring passerby offered him a swig of methadone to help with the pain...

...unfortunately the Celtic fan then drank the entire dose of methadone and was then further assaulted by the hitherto Good-Samaritan junkie

...and so he came in drunk,hallucinating and with a rapidly slowing heart rate ...

...where unfortunately he met me...And all he wanted to know was...what was the final score...

So I told him...."Idiots : Nil, Racial and Religious Bigotry : One"

1 comment:

  1. In Glasgow, like a lot of places, nurses and doctors in A&E wear green or blue suits. It is not unknown for a 'supporter' of one side to refuse to be treated by someone because they are wearing the "wrong" colour.