Friday, 5 December 2008

What your mother didn't tell you

Dear Jerque T'off

Just for the record,-although I am sure that your mother would have told you this-, but always...always...put on clean underwear in case you have an accident and you get taken to hospital.

And if you decide to attend my Unit at a time of your own choosing,then,really...please put on clean underwear.

Now I appreciate that as a lawyer that you didn't have the benefit of an expensive education ,but honestly,did you really think that I would be able to properly examine your knee unless you took your trousers off?

I'm not sure which view was worse to be honest:-the yellow and crusted front view,with your left testicle coyly poking out from your (once) white boxer shorts;or the skid-marks on the back view.

Either way I felt unable to eat my seafood linguini...the scallops were too pale and the prawns too rude.

If you could follow this basic courtesy then it will make for a more pleasant experience for the next nurse or doctor who has to examine you.

Kind regards
Lucien de Beer

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