Saturday, 13 December 2008

Saturday statistics

Twelve days,and 1 weekend before Christmas,and in the middle of a gale-driven rain storm there were already 5 patients waiting when we opened the door at 08h00 today.

Seventy patients had booked in by 13h00 although only another 62 had booked in by the time we closed at 21h30.

I saw 34 of the patients:-
  1. 1 PFO with unknown mechanism-of-injury resulting in a sprained left wrist
  2. 5 young women with UTI symptoms
  3. 1 acute-exacerbation-of -asthma
  4. 1 baby with impetigo
  5. (All the babies were cute)
  6. 26 patients with viral URTI's
  7. 2 of the patients apologised for not having had a shower before attending
  8. 7 didn't,but should have
  9. 2 patients returned my initial greeting
  10. No one said goodbye although 3 parents said 'thank you'
  11. 24 complained aggressively when I declined to prescribe antibiotics for their viral illness
  12. 3 filled in a complaint form
  13. 1 patient wanted to hit me until I stood up and picked up my trauma shears...which I leave conveniently on my desk
  14. 12 are unemployed and on income support or incapacity benefit-all of them are smokers and all have a cell phone
  15. 1 of them had just been on holiday in Europe for 6 days
  16. 97% of the patients were ugly and their mothers had dressed them funny
  17. 2 of the babies were FLK's,with FLP's
  18. 3 people wished me a Happy Christmas
  19. 11 is the number of slices that Julian managed to get from an M&S 2-for-1 Swiss Roll
  20. 39.9C was the temperature of the sickest child I saw today
  21. 73m is the length of tinsel that has been put up in the Unit today by Julian
  22. 2 referrals made to orthopaedics-one for a colleagues patient
  23. No patients in the Resus Room today
  24. Only 2 patients asked me what part of Australia I came from
  25. 3 is the amount of mince-pies with custard that I ate when I got home this evening

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